2 Comments

When Two Worlds Collide: BDSM, Community Organizing and Global Domination

A few months back, I was contacted by a guy who called himself a Dom. Unfortunately, he was quick to anger and not interested in listening. Good thing all Doms are not like that, because what happened was an unfortunate misunderstanding.

He asked me if I knew about domination and submission. I said, “Yes, it’s part of my everyday life.”

He pegged me as submissive and told me how he hates topping from the bottom. He asked me how many times I have topped from the bottom.

“Lots…” I said, but he didn’t let me continue.

He got pissed off and told me he was going to drag me by my hair.

I just kind of laughed, because I was talking about something entirely different than he was. I was talking about organizing protests for a job I had. And domination? Well, my undergrad thesis was on colonialism.

He got pissed off about me laughing. And I tried to explain, but he wouldn’t let me.

He asked me how I would like it if I sucked his dick for half and hour and then have him tell me, “You’re not getting a drop of cum until you do it perfectly.” I thought, “Geez, tell this to a recovering perfectionist. Sounds like torture. No thanks. I did enough of that to myself getting my M.A.”

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About Jen

Have been a jack of all trades. I'm a former philosopher who specialized in ethics and political philosophy. I'm a sex positive feminist.

2 comments on “When Two Worlds Collide: BDSM, Community Organizing and Global Domination

  1. Wow, nothing like playing to the stereotypes, huh?

    For some years I’ve been on a kick that the kinky play that a lot of people do is a type of D/s, but of such a different mindset that the terms (indeed, the paradigm that is popular among BDSMers) really needs some new terminology.

    My personal perspective has been operating from the female top, male bottom side, but I can see that there’s some work to do in the other dynamics as well.

    It’s unfortunate that so many people don’t realize that “dominant” does not have to be the same as “self-centered jackass.”

  2. Yeah, I don’t know if the guy was even a “real dom,” if you will. We are pleased to have a dom of over 20 years as a contributor here and he’s nothing like this dude I’m talking about.

    (Love your blog, btw)

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