It is all to often a Submissive or slave is in awe of her master. They love him dearly, he can do no wrong.
Your new to the lifestyle and very eager to learn and please, you have craved the lifestyle, you wanted to be owned, controlled , used at your Masters hands, you want to serve in all ways give yourself, the more you give the better you fell, you start to feel complete..
The relationship goes well for a month or so, then things begin to change. You ask a question and he snaps at you. He is having a bad day and he yells at you. Tells you that your stupid.
He use to talk a lot, but that has all but stopped, the communication is not there, he has become grouchy, and you feel it is your fault.
The sessions are not what you expected, the impact play is to hard, but you say nothing, because this is what you have wanted for so long. You know you can adjust, and soon you will be able to take what he is giving. You heard about after care, but you are not getting it after play.
He leaves the room and you stand looking at your bruises, your sore, but this is what you have wanted all your life.
He has cut your friends off, you are no longer allowed to talk or see them, he has limited you from seeing your family.
This my friends is a classic case of abuse in the lifestyle. This happens everyday, and the submissive or slave will take it, because they want to feel wanted, acceptance, but the bottom line is your still just as lonely, and lost;…
First of all, a good Dominant is in control of himself, not controlling. A Dominant should never raise his voice at his pet. There is no reason for this a clear sign of abuse.
Communication is the key to everything. A Dominant should set aside time everyday to sit and talk, this is your free time, to talk about anything, with no judgement, no punishment, concerns you may have.
Sessions are meant to be fun, they help each of you grow. I myself during play, throughout the entire session I am talking, I ma making sure she is okay, asking her if she has reached her limit. This is very important. She is not there to hurt.
After care is probably the most important aspect of play. This is something the submissive needs, she craves this, after all she has just giving herself to you without question. This is the Dominants time to hold, caress, talk to about what she just experienced, to make her feel wanted, and safe..
If your reading this, and your having second thoughts about your relationship, you need to have a long talk with your owner…